THE TEMPEST

Act 2 Scene 2

(Enter Caliban, wearing a gaberdine, and with a burden of wood.)
l1l	Caliban	(throwing down his burden)
		 All the infections that the sun sucks up
l2l		From bogs, fens, flats, on Prosper fall, and make him
l3l		By inch-meal a disease!
		(A noise of thunder heard)
		 His spirits hear me,
l4l		And yet I needs must curse. But they’ll nor pinch,
l5l		Fright me with urchin-shows, pitch me i’ th’ mire,
l6l		Nor lead me like a fire-brand in the dark
l7l		Out of my way, unless he bid ’em. But
l8l		For every trifle are they set upon me#
l9l		Sometime like apes, that mow and chatter at me
l10l		And after bite me# then like hedgehogs, which
l11l		Lie tumbling in my barefoot way and mount
l12l		Their pricks at my footfall# sometime am I
l13l		All wound with adders, who with cloven tongues
l14l		Do hiss me into madness.
		(Enter Trinculo)
		 Lo now, lo!
l15l		Here comes a spirit of his, and to torment me
l16l		For bringing wood in slowly. I’ll fall flat.
l17l		Perchance he will not mind me.
		(He lies down)
l18l	Trinculo	 Here’s neither bush nor shrub to bear off any
l19l		weather at all, and another storm brewing. I hear it
l20l		sing i’ th’ wind. Yon same black cloud, yon huge one,
l21l		looks like a foul bombard that would shed his liquor.
l22l		If it should thunder as it did before, I know not where
l23l		to hide my head. Yon same cloud cannot choose but
l24l		fall by pailfuls.
		(Seeing Caliban)
		 What have we here, a
l25l		man or a fish? Dead or alive?—A fish, he smells like
l26l		a fish# a very ancient and fish-like smell# a kind of not-
l27l		of-the-newest poor-john. A strange fish! Were I in
l28l		England now, as once I was, and had but this fish
l29l		painted, not a holiday-fool there but would give a piece
l30l		of silver. There would this monster make a man. Any
l31l		strange beast there makes a man. When they will not
l32l		give a doit to relieve a lame beggar, they will lay out
l33l		ten to see a dead Indian. Legged like a man, and his
l34l		fins like arms! Warm, o’ my troth! I do now let loose
l35l		my opinion, hold it no longer. This is no fish, but an
l36l		islander that hath lately suffered by a thunderbolt.
		(Thunder)
l37l		Alas, the storm is come again. My best way is to creep
l38l		under his gaberdine# there is no other shelter hereabout.
l39l		Misery acquaints a man with strange bedfellows. I will
l40l		here shroud till the dregs of the storm be past.
		(He hides under Caliban's gaberdine.)
l41l		Enter Stefano, singing, with a wooden bottle in his hand
	Stefano	> I shall no more to sea, to sea,
l42l		Here shall I die ashore—
l43l		This is a very scurvy tune to sing at a man’s funeral.
l44l		Well, here’s my comfort.
		(He drinks, then sings)
l45l		> The master, the swabber, the boatswain, and I,
l46l		The gunner and his mate,
l47l		Loved Mall, Meg, and Marian, and Margery,
l48l		But none of us cared for Kate.
l49l		For she had a tongue with a tang,
l50l		Would cry to a sailor “Go hang!”
l51l		She loved not the savour of tar nor of pitch,
l52l		Yet a tailor might scratch her where’er she did itch.
l53l		Then to sea, boys, and let her go hang!
l54l		Then to sea, etc.
l55l		This is a scurvy tune, too. But here’s my comfort.
		(He drinks)
l56l	Caliban	(to Trinculo)
		 Do not torment me! O!
l57l	Stefano	What’s the matter? Have we devils here? Do
l58l		you put tricks upon ’s with savages and men of Ind,
l59l		ha? I have not scaped drowning to be afeard now of
l60l		your four legs. For it hath been said: “As proper a man
l61l		as ever went on four legs cannot make him give
l62l		ground.” And it shall be said so again, while Stefano
l63l		breathes at’ nostrils.
l64l	Caliban	The spirit torments me. O!
l65l	Stefano	This is some monster of the isle with four legs,
l66l		who hath got, as I take it, an ague. Where the devil
l67l		should he learn our language? I will give him some
l68l		relief, if it be but for that. If I can recover him and
l69l		keep him tame and get to Naples with him, he’s a
l70l		present for any emperor that ever trod on neat’s leather.
l71l	Caliban	(to Trinculo)
		 Do not torment me, prithee! I’ll
l72l		bring my wood home faster.
l73l	Stefano	He’s in his fit now, and does not talk after the
l74l		wisest. He shall taste of my bottle. If he have never
l75l		drunk wine afore, it will go near to remove his fit. If I
l76l		can recover him and keep him tame, I will not take
l77l		too much for him. He shall pay for him that hath him,
l78l		and that soundly.
l79l	Caliban	(to Trinculo)
		 Thou dost me yet but little hurt.
l80l		Thou wilt anon, I know it by thy trembling. Now
l81l		Prosper works upon thee.
l82l	Stefano	Come on your ways. Open your mouth. Here is
l83l		that which will give language to you, cat. Open your
l84l		mouth. This will shake your shaking, I can tell you,
l85l		and that soundly. You cannot tell who’s your friend.
l86l		Open your chaps again.
		(Caliban drinks)
l87l	Trinculo	 I should know that voice. It should be—but he
l88l		is drowned, and these are devils. O, defend me!
l89l	Stefano	Four legs and two voices—a most delicate
l90l		monster! His forward voice now is to speak well of his
l91l		friend# his backward voice is to utter foul speeches and
l92l		to detract. If all the wine in my bottle will recover him,
l93l		I will help his ague. Come.
		(Caliban drinks)
l94l		Amen. I will pour some in thy other mouth.
l95l	Trinculo	Stefano!
l96l	Stefano	Doth thy other mouth call me? Mercy, mercy!
l97l		This is a devil, and no monster. I will leave him. I have
l98l		no long spoon.
l99l	Trinculo	Stefano! If thou beest Stefano, touch me and
l100l		speak to me, for I am Trinculo. Be not afeard. Thy good
l101l		friend Trinculo.
l102l	Stefano	If thou beest Trinculo, come forth. I’ll pull thee by
l103l		the lesser legs. If any be Trinculo’s legs, these are they.
		(He pulls out Trinculo by the legs)
l104l		Thou art very Trinculo indeed! How cam’st thou to be
l105l		the siege of this moon-calf? Can he vent Trinculos?
l106l	Trinculo	(rising)
		 I took him to be killed with a
l107l		thunderstroke. But art thou not drowned, Stefano? I
l108l		hope now thou art not drowned. Is the storm
l109l		overblown? I hid me under the dead moon-calf’s
l110l		gaberdine for fear of the storm. And art thou living,
l111l		Stefano? O Stefano, two Neapolitans scaped!
		(He dances Stefano round)
l112l	Stefano	 Prithee, do not turn me about. My stomach is
l113l		not constant.
l114l	Caliban	 These be fine things, an if they be not spirits.
l115l		That’s a brave god, and bears celestial liquor.
l116l		I will kneel to him.
		(He kneels)
l117l	Stefano	(to Trinculo)
		 How didst thou scape? How cam’st
l118l		thou hither? Swear by this bottle how thou cam’st
l119l		hither. I escaped upon a butt of sack which the sailors
l120l		heaved o’erboard, by this bottle—which I made of the
l121l		bark of a tree with mine own hands since I was cast
l122l		ashore.
l123l	Caliban	I’ll swear upon that bottle to be thy true subject,
l124l		for the liquor is not earthly.
l125l	Stefano	(offering Trinculo the bottle)
		 Here. Swear then how
l126l		thou escapedst.
l127l	Trinculo	Swum ashore, man, like a duck. I can swim
l128l		like a duck, I’ll be sworn.
l129l	Stefano	Here, kiss the book.
		(Trinculo drinks)
l130l		Though thou canst swim like a duck, thou art made
l131l		like a goose.
l132l	Trinculo	O Stefano, hast any more of this?
l133l	Stefano	The whole butt, man. My cellar is in a rock by
l134l		th’ seaside, where my wine is hid.
		(Caliban rises)
l135l		How now, moon-calf? How does thine ague?
l136l	Caliban	Hast thou not dropped from heaven?
l137l	Stefano	Out o’ th’ moon, I do assure thee. I was the man
l138l		i’ th’ moon when time was.
l139l	Caliban	 I have seen thee in her, and I do adore thee.
l140l		My mistress showed me thee, and thy dog and thy bush.
l141l	Stefano	 Come, swear to that. Kiss the book. I will furnish
l142l		it anon with new contents. Swear.
		(Caliban drinks)
l143l	Trinculo	 By this good light, this is a very shallow
l144l		monster! I afeard of him? A very weak monster! The
l145l		man i’ th’ moon? A most poor, credulous monster! Well
l146l		drawn, monster, in good sooth!
l147l	Caliban	(to Stefano)
		 I’ll show thee every fertile inch o’ th’ island,
l148l		And I will kiss thy foot. I prithee, be my god.
l149l	Trinculo	 By this light, a most perfidious and drunken
l150l		monster! When ’s god’s asleep, he’ll rob his bottle.
l151l	Caliban	(to Stefano)
		 I’ll kiss thy foot. I’ll swear myself thy subject.
l152l	Stefano	 Come on then# down, and swear.
		(Caliban kneels)
l153l	Trinculo	 I shall laugh myself to death at this puppy-
l154l		headed monster. A most scurvy monster! I could find
l155l		in my heart to beat him—
l156l	Stefano	(to Caliban)
		 Come, kiss.
		( 156 Caliban kisses his foot)
l157l	Trinculo	 But that the poor monster’s in drink. An
l158l		abominable monster!
l159l	Caliban	 I’ll show thee the best springs# I’ll pluck thee berries#
l160l		I’ll fish for thee, and get thee wood enough.
l161l		A plague upon the tyrant that I serve!
l162l		I’ll bear him no more sticks, but follow thee,
l163l		Thou wondrous man.
l164l	Trinculo	 A most ridiculous monster, to make a wonder
l165l		of a poor drunkard!
l166l	Caliban	(to Stefano)
		 I prithee, let me bring thee where crabs grow,
l167l		And I with my long nails will dig thee pig-nuts,
l168l		Show thee a jay’s nest, and instruct thee how
l169l		To snare the nimble marmoset. I’ll bring thee
l170l		To clust’ring filberts, and sometimes I’ll get thee
l171l		Young seamews from the rock. Wilt thou go with me?
l172l	Stefano	 I prithee now, lead the way without any more
l173l		talking.—Trinculo, the King and all our company else
l174l		being drowned, we will inherit here.—Here, bear my
l175l		bottle.—Fellow Trinculo, we’ll fill him by and by again.
l176l	Caliban	(sings drunkenly)
		 Farewell, master, farewell,
l177l		farewell!
l178l	Trinculo	A howling monster, a drunken monster!
l179l	Caliban	(sings)
		> No more dams I’ll make for fish,
l180l		Nor fetch in firing
l181l		At requiring,
l182l		Nor scrape trenchering, nor wash dish.
l183l		’Ban, ’ban, Cacaliban
l184l		Has a new master.—Get a new man!
l185l		Freedom, high-day! High-day, freedom! Freedom, high-
l186l		day, freedom!
l187l	Stefano	O brave monster! Lead the way.
		(Exeunt)
	[[ACT INTERVAL]]